You’ve Been in Church for Years—But Have You Grown Up?

THE DEVOTION

Beloved,

Someone identifies a careless word you spoke. Before that person finishes, you begin explaining your intentions. They describe the damage; you describe your history. They ask you to consider what happened; you remind them how long you have served.

The conversation has changed. A concern about your conduct has become a defense of your credentials.

This is where spiritual maturity becomes visible. It meets us in the ordinary moment when truth reaches a place we would rather protect.

Years of worship, service, and study matter. We should honor faithful perseverance. Yet the calendar cannot answer every question about our growth. A long religious history can coexist with an unwillingness to acknowledge present wrongdoing.

We can know where a verse is located and still resist where its instruction leads.

When correction arrives, what receives our first loyalty: the truth being presented or the image we want preserved?

Paul’s teaching in Ephesians gives that question a larger setting. In Ephesians 4:11–16, Christ provides ministry gifts to equip His people for service and strengthen the whole body. The goal includes shared faith, knowledge of the Son, and maturity measured by Christ. The passage confronts susceptibility to deceptive teaching and describes growth through truth and love under Christ’s headship.

Paul is addressing the church’s common life. Spiritual maturity reaches beyond an individual’s confidence or religious vocabulary. It affects whether people are grounded in truth, equipped to serve, and contributing to the growth of others.

Receiving sound correction is one practical application of that movement. People committed to growing under Christ must remain willing to examine what they believe and how they behave.

The Greek word behind “children” in verse 14 is νήπιοι, nēpioi, the plural of νήπιος, nēpios. The term can refer to an infant or child; its figurative force depends on context. Here Paul uses childhood imagery for spiritual immaturity expressed in vulnerability to deceptive teaching. Growth therefore requires discernment: learning to recognize truth and respond to it. That has consequences for how we receive correction.

If truth is necessary for growth, refusing to examine a correction can protect the very error that needs to be addressed. Discernment requires us to test what we hear. Pride prefers to disqualify the speaker before considering the evidence.

You may recognize that impulse in an ordinary conversation.

A spouse says your tone was dismissive. You answer that you provide for the household.

A colleague identifies an error in your work. You explain how much experience you have.

Someone points out that you repeated an unverified claim. You tell them your heart was in the right place.

Provision, experience, and sincere intentions do not settle those concerns. The question remains: Was the tone dismissive? Was the work incorrect? Was the claim true?

Answer the matter actually raised.

An explanation can help another person understand your conduct. It becomes an excuse when you use it to avoid responsibility. The person harmed by your words needs more than an account of what you meant. Where you have done wrong, acknowledge it plainly and take the appropriate steps to repair it.

This examination also belongs to the person offering correction.

Do not use another person’s vulnerability as an opportunity to display superiority. State the concern accurately. Identify the conduct rather than attacking the person’s worth. Give the evidence. Seek restoration rather than humiliation.

Truth and love govern both sides of the conversation.

Nor does spiritual maturity require accepting every accusation. A charge can be mistaken. A demand can be manipulative. Someone may call your refusal to participate in wrongdoing “rebellion” or your request for evidence “pride.”

Examine the claim. Ask what happened, what Scripture actually requires, and whether the conclusion follows from the evidence. Where the accusation is false, answer it truthfully. Where the correction is sound, receive it without making the messenger pay for telling you.

No leader’s title makes that leader infallible. No person’s lack of a title makes an observation automatically false.

Christ remains the measure.

He is more than a standard we invoke to win an argument. His lordship reaches our explanations, our habits, our treatment of people, and our willingness to repent. We cannot honestly ask Him to govern our lives while reserving our defensiveness as territory beyond His authority.

Consider one correction you recently resisted.

Set aside, for a moment, whether you appreciated the delivery. Write down the actual concern in a sentence the other person would recognize. Then examine it.

Did I speak inaccurately? Did I break a commitment? Did I dismiss someone without hearing them? Did I use Scripture to support a conclusion the passage does not establish?

If you find wrongdoing, name it without adding a counteraccusation.

“I spoke unfairly.”

“I gave you information I had not checked.”

“I dismissed your concern instead of listening.”

Then address what follows. Correct the false statement. Keep the neglected commitment. Apologize for the contempt. Change the practice that keeps producing the same harm.

An apology should lead to conduct that can be examined.

Growth will sometimes require returning to a familiar conversation with a different response. You may need to listen without interrupting, ask a question before defending yourself, or admit that another person saw something you had refused to see.

These actions do not purchase God’s acceptance. They give concrete expression to a life being brought under Christ’s authority.

And they affect more than your private development. A teachable parent makes room for honest conversation. An accountable leader gives others permission to tell the truth. A teacher who corrects an error demonstrates that faithful interpretation matters more than appearing flawless.

Others learn from what we defend. They also learn from what we are willing to correct.

Today, take one truthful step where you have been making repeated explanations. Let the person affected see responsibility expressed in action.

Thursday, we will carry this examination into another revealing moment: how we respond when offense provokes us. For today, stay with the correction in front of you.

Do not use the years behind you to refuse the obedience required of you now.

Read in context: Ephesians 4:11–16, ESV. Language reference: Mounce’s Greek Dictionary: νήπιος (nēpios).